here is the light

anna - lj
janet - lj
lauren k
lauren t
lena - lj
nadine - lj
steve - lj


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Monday, August 16, 2004
If I acknowledge it publicly, then it isn't true.

Wednesday, January 07, 2004
Note to self: You still have a blog.

Tuesday, November 25, 2003
People are really fucking funny creatures.

Monday, November 17, 2003
Purple Politics

Part One
Virtual Lena: hey there
Victor nj: hi
Virtual Lena: I sent you a PM before the forum got taken down. I don't know if you got it
Victor nj: about what?
Virtual Lena: about how I should be an admin once the new forum gets up and running. Because I've been around forever and I have good grammar and spelling skills. :-)
Victor nj: Oh I saw that. I didn't take serious. I thought you were kidding
Virtual Lena: Why would you think that?
Victor nj: Just the way you worded it, not to mention that unless martine over-rules me, which isn't likely, that won't happen.
Virtual Lena: Um. All right. And how did I "word it," if that's the problem?
Virtual Lena: I can't see where Martine figures in anyway. You seem to have free reign over the site.
Victor nj: You worded it fine, I suppose, I just think that coming out of left field, that sounded funny considering grammar and spelling have virtually nothing to do with being an Admin.
Virtual Lena: What does, then?
Virtual Lena: Being around long enough to become known at the site? I think I've got seniority over many of the current admins.
Virtual Lena: Responsibility? Let's see... I've been a mod, PE'd three pages...
Victor nj: Lena... let me be blunt: 1) I'm busy with the move. 2) I don't see you being an Admin, period.
Virtual Lena: You're not giving me any reasons why.
Victor nj: I dont have to, and I dont plan to.
Virtual Lena: Uh huh.
Virtual Lena: Martine did tell me, before the last forum change, that she and Steph were kicking around the idea of making me an admin. I'll assume, then, that you shot them down?
Victor nj: They never brought it up. But if they did, and asked for my opinion, I would shoot it down, yes.
Virtual Lena: Interesting.
Virtual Lena: And why do you have me singled out as never being an admin?
Victor nj: You're not singled out -- many people probably wouldn't be admins.
Virtual Lena: Victor. Look at some of the admins you've had in the past who rarely visited the forum. I'm there a lot more than they were. It's not like I'm some n00b looking to be an admin.
Victor nj: Well, for me, Admins, more than anything else, are people that we should see eye-to-eye on, that basically agree with the direction of this site. Basically, the selection process os purely subjective. There are no tests to pass, or qualifications that render you above someone else. So, I basically choose people that are easy going and I can get along with.
Virtual Lena: Mmm. I'd suspected I was too old for you (albeit in a different capacity).
Victor nj: too old? LOL
Virtual Lena: Well, I can't cater to your underage whims.
Virtual Lena: And evidently I'm useless WRT the site, since I'd be aiming to keep some maturity about it.
Virtual Lena: ... which, as you say, doesn't agree with the "direction" you have in mind.
Virtual Lena: So, all right. You've swayed me away from wanting to be an admin.
Virtual Lena: Thank you for your time. :-)

Part Two
Virtual Lena: I just thought of something
SteveUberAlles: wut
Virtual Lena: are there any PJ admins who were around when the site first got a forum?
SteveUberAlles: shmile?
Virtual Lena: hmm. admins who actually visit, though?
SteveUberAlles: well, when you put it that way....
Virtual Lena: so that's it. they don't want to admin anyone who remembers what the site USED to be.
SteveUberAlles: well, how many originals are around anymore, that haven't totally disqualified themselves?
Virtual Lena: It's oddly disillusioning, yet it makes sense.
Virtual Lena: well, I never really "went over" to CR, because I wasn't accepted there...
Virtual Lena: but I guess posting in that forum is enough to count me out
SteveUberAlles: unless you're raven or meg.
Virtual Lena: ... neither of whom were around in the early days of the CG forum.
Virtual Lena: Dag, yo. They're good.

Tuesday, October 21, 2003
OMG D00D LOL WFT r0x0r I HAVE A SHOW. I think.

I went up to the radio station to ask a few questions about subbing this show tonight (do I have to turn the station off when I leave, can I play whatever I want, how do I work the replay machine again? That sort of thing). So the nice Craig person showed me how to find the sign off sound byte on the replay machine and where the key is to make us go away, and I think I'm good for tonight. So if you're in range, I'll be on teh r4d10 from 1-3 AM tonight. Tomorrow morning. 92.1 in the 'Burgh.

While I was up there I noticed a show schedule lying on the counter. Last night I'd been looking for Mike's show (since he's the guy I trained with and I don't feel stupid about asking him stupid questions) but he wasn't on, and the guy who usually comes on after him, Riyaz, was there instead. Well, Mike must've lost his show because his name was crossed out and Riyaz was written in the 11-1 slot. Which left Riyaz's 1-3 slot empty.

I asked the nice Allison station manager person if anyone had taken it yet and she said "no, do you want it?" And I asked if I could and she said sure, so I put my name in the slot on the schedule. I'm not counting on anything, but I SUPPOSE this means the slot's mine until I hear otherwise.

So, w00tw00tw00tw00tw00tw00tw00tw00t!

Sunday, October 19, 2003
helscome my wedsite.

I want some big knee-high stompy boots. Like this, but without the buckles. Something that I can wear with... well, most of my skirts, since my spiderweb boots don't match them, nor are they high enough to look good.

I found a pair somewhere online but I'm hesitant to buy them without being able to try them on. *grumbles*

It's really hot in my room again. When I moved in, the radiator wouldn't shut off so I put in a maintenance request and they fixed it. But now, since winter's coming, apparently they've come around to "insure that all building systems are working properly in advance of the cold weather season." Which means that they've turned my heat back on, so my room is an oven even when the thing is turned all the way down. If my makeup melts again I'mma be pissed awf.

Wednesday, October 15, 2003
Please get out of my head now.

I dreamt I found a card I'd meant to send to him but never finished writing, tucked away inside my Atlas Shrugged with some old paycheck stubs. I think it must've been a Rosh Hashana card, though I can't figure out why it had Santa Claus on the front.

I've been wearing his ring simply because I still have it.

I still need to write to his mother. I looked at sympathy cards but I hate them all.