here is the light

anna - lj
janet - lj
lauren k
lauren t
lena - lj
nadine - lj
steve - lj


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Friday, April 04, 2003
I went to the gym today because I'm trying to get in shape. Like, for real this time. I decided I'm going to go out there a couple times a week after I get done with work instead of just going once a week on a day off.

I'm starting to time myself on how long it takes me to run a mile on the treadmill -- I've always sucked at running and I haven't really run and timed myself since the physical fitness test in 9th grade, when I did it in 11 minutes. So it's been about 6 years. Last week, when I started, I was at 13 minutes, and now I'm at 12. Still crappy, but evidently getting better. I'll get down under 10 soon enough.

So I was on the treadmill for half an hour, then I used some of the weight machines (arms, mostly, but some leg presses and hip stuff too) and decided I'd give the elliptical trainer a try. That thing is my archnemesis -- I get on and manage to do a little bit, but then I get tired and I go away. So today I thought I'd push myself to stay on it, and I went for almost 20 minutes. *beams* I'll conquer it yet.

Maybe next I'll start watching what I eat. Have been looking into the Atkins diet but it's gonna be impossible as long as I'm living at home (insert "Lena wants her own kitchen" rant here). *shrugs* I've stopped drinking pop, though. It's a start.

Thursday, April 03, 2003
I could stand to change the colors on this blog. And maybe the layout. If I get fancy I might even add an image.

Dreamed about this house last night. First words out of my mouth as I woke up were "What the fuck is up with that house?" I'd seen it in dreams before. Once, my dad lived in it, and last night it was Steve and his roommate's place. I know it's shown up other times. I don't know whose it is or if it exists.

On a seemingly unrelated note, I'm all a-squee and grinning like an idiot. ♥.♥

Wednesday, April 02, 2003
Something weird happened to my mind at work today. For some reason I was thinking of sex. Don't know why. And then I couldn't remember having sex... I can remember the various settings, or even the date that I last had sex, but I don't remember the act in any case. I don't remember the feeling. It's like it never even happened. I feel like I might as well be a virgin. Fucking weird.


Work sucked. Eight hours of blocking (straightening shelves and making sure things are in their proper places). Stuff kept falling off the shelves and my back hurt and I kept getting dizzy when I stood up. Sucked sucked sucked. And I have to go back tomorrow. >.<

Oh, yeah. Happy birthday to Emily.

Tuesday, April 01, 2003
I don't know what I'm doing right now. Had an entry in mind but now it's gone and I don't remember what it was.

Weirdness with internet people. Can't help feeling that now I'm on the other end of things I've seen before. Weird weird weird and I don't know what to say.

Was stocking stationery aisle at work today and looking at highlighters and thinking about how I can't wait for school to start in May, even if this will only be the fic writing class ("only," she says, even though now it may very well be her major) when what I'm really ready for is lit class in the fall. Or, the three lit classes I'm signed up for in the fall. Can't wait.

Need a second job. Desparately.

Monday, March 31, 2003
Went to sleep at 6 and woke up around 1. I my day off.

I'm bleeding and it hurts. *whimpers*

I suppose this entry's gonna be about yesterday, since it came to be 5 AM somewhere along the way and I can hear someone's alarm clock going off. So whenever I say "today," I mean Sunday.

On Saturday, Mollie went to Goodwill and dropped off 13 bags of clothes that were just taking up space in the house. Today my mom notices that a good chunk of her mending bin was apparently in with that stuff, and she's livid because Mollie hadn't asked first. And of course Mollie's gone over to her boyfriend's and is unavailable for questioning. Mom's flipping out, so I call Goodwill and ask them whether it would be possible to find the stuff Mollie brought in and see if we could rescue Mom's mending stuff. The manager says "well, some of it might have been put out on the floor, but you can come and see if you can identify your bags..." Probably thinks we're bloody insane.

I call Mollie and tell her I'm picking her up to go to Goodwill to find Mom's mending stuff. Mollie says "oh, that's very materialistic of her, but ok..." I tell Mom what she said and Mom gets even more upset, undoubtedly made worse by the fact that she's still feeling ill AND the fact that Kris and Dustin's band was practicing in the basement at about 80000000 dB. So I pick up Mollie, we go to Goodwill, and end up rooting through a pile of bags in a big trailer. We do find our bags, and a few of the things from the mending bin, but Mom was still upset because she was looking for a specific dress and a specific suit and didn't find them.

Interesting conversation driving home. Mollie says she heard a rumor about Kris and Dustin's guitar player being arrested in connection with drugs. Mom and I didn't know anything about that, but there was this guy Tim (total asshole) from their circle of friends who recently got busted for dealing drugs (I think he had two or three pounds of weed on him), and they want him to give names of other people involved or else he'll go to jail. And I'm going "hell, I can name names (including the ex)..." And then Mollie says "he offered me coke once."

Mom and I go "WHAT?" And Mollie says "yeah, he was driving me to Angela's and asked me if I wanted some."

I don't doubt it. I know he bought some (on several occasions) while we were together, and I don't know why I didn't dump him sooner. Hell, if I would have known that he was OFFERING MY LITTLE SISTERS DRUGS I would have gotten rid of him immediately.

What an asshole. What. An. Asshole.

Came home, tried to clean my room, took some ebay pictures and listed a few auctions. Nothing else particularly earth-shattering.